Phoenix Tears
by Shadow and Phoenix
Summary: A moonlit night and a question.  What is the price of happiness?  [oneshot]


Title: Phoenix Tears

Author: Phoenix

Rating: K

Disclaimer: No, it's not mine

A moonlit night and a question.  
What is the price of happiness?  
That was the question on the mind of Fujiwara no Sai as he sat awake one night unable to sleep.  
Happiness. That meant one person. Lady Ryuu. Sai smiled to himself remembering the night he had discovered Ryuu's secret.  
----Japan 944----  
Lady Ryuu walked briskly to the main palace garden careful not to tread on the hem of her robes. For the first time she was wearing eighteen layers of robes, just as those before her had on their eighteenth birthdays. Her long black hair, which normally just brushed the ground, was being held up by a topknot and a gold dragon clip. Arriving at the garden Ryuu scanned the small group enjoying the party for a particular person, and soon found him reminiscing by the lake, blue-black hair reflecting the lanterns from the party.  
'Sai is more handsome than ever,' thought Ryuu as she worked her way through the guests to join her adopted brother by the lake. Ryuu didn't need to speak for Sai to notice her presence. Sai turned, his sky blue eyes meeting Ryuu's golden brown ones.  
"You look beautiful Ryuu," said Sai using the name Ryuu had received from her yin-yang personality.  
"The same is true for you Sai," said Ryuu, a blush creeping into her cheeks. "You've grown since our last meeting."  
It was Sai's turn to blush, hiding behind his fan he turned to sit down on a bench by the lake. Ryuu soon joined him.  
"Sai, listen there's something I need to tell you."  
Hearing the concern in her voice, Sai turned back to face Ryuu once again. Visible around her neck was a yin-yang pendant with dragons forming the black and white sides.  
"Sai, I'm a spirit living in this world and today is the day I choose my partner. In addition to being a spirit, I'm a spirit guardian, a person who protects and guides spirits living in the human world. The other special thing about spirit guardians is we usually have a soul mate hidden in time and space. Sai, it may come as a shock, but you're the one I feel a special pull towards. In other words you're my soul mate, the final decision is yours, but you're the one I chose.  
While saying this Ryuu extended her hand to show two jade pendants, both with a goban and go stones in the center, but one with a dragon on the outside and one with a phoenix on the outside.

"These pendants are the symbol of our bond, by accepting one you accept me."   
The pair was silent for a few moments, Sai contemplating Ryuu's speech, before his expression softened. Then Sai extended his hand and placed it in Ryuu's gently catching the cord that held the phoenix pendant.  
"From the moment I met you I knew we belonged together," Said Sai gently leaning in and giving Ryuu a soft kiss on the cheek.  
That had been a happy memory, but didn't help answer the question. Sai thought for a little longer while watching the moon drift among the clouds, before he remembered another memory; it had led to happiness, but not for him.  
----Japan 1721----  
The first light of sunrise flowed through a circular window on the second floor of the shogun's palace in Edo, Japan illuminating the waist length purple haired spirit by the window. The appearance would have been that of a normal day, had the spirit's hands not been bound with rope. Feeling the sunlight, the spirit's thoughts turned to the events of the previous day.  
'Traitor'  
'Fujiwara no Sai is a traitor'  
'He knew what was at stake, yet he broke the laws and betrayed his country'  
"Sakoku policy, no one may enter or leave on pain of death," Sai whispered softly to himself. As Sai turned back towards the rising sun the once bright fire in his eyes was extinguished by silent tears.  
'At least Ryuu never doubted my innocence,' thought Sai to himself remembering something she had said to him that day.  
"You're only a traitor to the people, to my eyes and those of your friends, your innocent"  
'Ryuu cared; Kuraiakki just wanted me out of the way. He didn't even listen to the warning I gave him, if it could be called a warning' thought Sai. For him it was probably one of the most vivid and painful memories of that time.  
The wet rope that bound Sai's wrists was starting to become painful, yet Sai didn't let it show. They weren't going to get to him that easily.  
Somewhere behind him a town official was reading off the charges against him, but Sai wasn't listening, he had just spotted an all too familiar face across the crowd.

"Kuraiakki" growled Sai under his breath.   
Kuraiakki must have noticed Sai glaring at him because the next moment he had come across the circle of onlookers.  
"What do you want traitor?"  
"That is what you are, I'd never betray my country or my family, besides you're just after Ryuu" Sai hissed so only Kuraiakki could hear.  
A second later sharpened steel blade lay dangerously close to Sai's neck.  
"If you weren't already being killed I would have you beheaded for that insult." Kuraiakki hissed back. "As it is your death will already be painful."  
Returning his sword to its sheath, Kuraiakki turned his back on Sai. When Kuraiakki was halfway across the circle, Sai decided to use his final weapon, telepathy.  
'Even if you aren't shedding my blood, your hands are still stained with it Kuraiakki.'  
Across the circle Kuraiakki showed no sighs of receiving the message as he disappeared into the crowd.  
Sai looked back out the window as the moon slid out from behind a cloud. The room was suddenly bathed in moonlight, as was Sai. The moonlight lit up scars on Sai's arms that looked curiously like flames. The scars were also visible on his back; painful reminders of the flames that had cost him his life.  
'My second death' Sai thought to himself. It had brought happiness, but only for Ryuu and Kuraiakki. As it was Ryuu had reverted to her spirit form two days later to be with him. I wasn't the only person who made sacrifices during those years.  
The answer that had seemed so elusive earlier that evening was suddenly all to plain.  
Sacrifices and suffering. Everyone has to suffer a little bit or sacrifice something they have to reach happiness, and rarely, thought Sai to himself fighting the tears the revelation brought, they give up everything they have


End file.
